Intro to Academic Writing(2) Wed 7,8
Compare and contrast essay
200902149 ELI Yu Hyelee
Dongdaemun and Myoungdong
Dongdaemun and Myoungdong are the most famous shopping areas in Korea. There are always full of people not only Koreans but tourists from various countries. In fact, in 2010 Seoul city researched 2,000 visitors from foreign countries about the place they visited or plan to go. 67 percent of tourists responded as Myoungdong and 50.4 percent people answered as Dongdaemun. There are two reasons why these two shopping areas are that famous.
First, Dongdaemun is famous for its unique clothes. There are many young designers' shops which sell clothes of their own desing at reasonable prices. These unique clothes are only available here so, people who love peculiar clothes prefer Dongdaemun. Unlike Dongdaemun, shops in Myoungdong usually are brand name shops. Therefore, people who like brand name clothes prefer Myoungdong. Second, Dongdaemun has many more various sizes and styles of clothes than Myoungdong. Dongdaemun has large size clothing shops next to normal shops, so men and women who wear plus size can easily buy the clothes they want. There are also many shops for middle age women. However, Myoungdong doesn't have these kinds of shops. Rather, it has clothes for young people with normal sizes. The clothes here are more fashionable so people who love the latest styles like Myoungdong.
Those two shopping areas have so many strong points that it's very hard to choose one. So, I select one shopping area according to my shopping items. Each shopping area has its distinctive strength so it's good to compare them and find the best one.
1. Yes, Dongdaemoon and Myungdong.
ReplyDelete2. It mostly focuses on contrast.
3. Yes, it has clear topic sentences.
4. It pointed contrast between Dongdaemoon and Myungdong; size, kinds of shops, etc.
5. Yes, it has support. There are examples that explain two places.
6. Yes, she uses appropriate connectors.
To Yu Hyelee From Kim Kyung Un
ReplyDelete1. The thesis statement doesn't compare two subjects but it shows that these two shopping places will be the main topic, and the body paragraph will mention the points regarding them.
2. The comaparioson and contrasting points are not divided into different paragraphs. However, It talks about both simlarity and contrasting points regarding one certain idea.
3. Yes there are thesis sentences for each paragraphs.
4.Each topic sentence states the point of comparison or contrast.
5. THere are enough interesting details to support the contrasting ideas.
6. There are connectors she used such as unlike, however. However, More connectors should be used to add coherence to overall comparison and contrast.
To – Eli Yu Hyelee From- Jitendra Kumar Gupta
ReplyDelete1. Does your thesis statement compare two subjects?
- Yes, this is done in between two shopping market namely Dongdaemoon and Myundong.
2. Does one body paragraph focus on comparison and one on contrast?
- No, Comparison and contrast is done in one body paragraph. However, the writer discussed similarity and contrast regarding the title itself.
3. Does each body paragraph have a clear topic sentence?
- Yes. But the writer discussed all this stuff in a single body paragraph.
4. Does each topic sentence state the point of comparison or contrast?
- Yes, each topic sentence states the point of comparison or contrast.
5. Does each body paragraph contain details to support the comparison or contrast?
- Yes, the body paragraph contains details to support the comparison or contrast.
6. Did you use connectors to add coherence?
- Yes, she uses connectors to add coherence.
Second draft
ReplyDelete200902149 Yu Hyelee
Dongdaemun and Myoungdong
There’s no doubt that Dongdaemun and Myoungdong are the most famous shopping areas in Korea. However, it’s hard to say both are just similar shopping areas. People visit these two places with different reasons because each has its own characteristics and strong points.
First, Dongdaemun is famous for its unique clothes. There are many young designers' shops which sell clothes of their own design at reasonable prices. These unique clothes are only available here so people who love peculiar clothes prefer Dongdaemun. Unlike Dongdaemun, shops in Myoungdong usually are brand name shops. Therefore, people who like brand name clothes prefer Myoungdong. Second, Dongdaemun has many more various sizes and styles of clothes than Myoungdong. Dongdaemun has large size clothing shops next to normal shops, so men and women who wear plus size can easily buy the clothes they want. There are also many shops for middle age women. However, Myoungdong doesn't have these kinds of shops. Rather, it has clothes for young people with normal sizes. The clothes here are more fashionable so people who love the latest styles visit Myoungdong.
In 2010 Seoul city researched 2,000 visitors from foreign countries about the place they visited or plan to go. 67 percent of tourists responded as Myoungdong and 50.4 percent people answered as Dongdaemun. As this research shows, both Myoungdong and Dongdaemun represent shopping area in Korea with its distinctive strength.