200903084
CHUNG Kyung Seo
Television is the most affective electronics to human life. It provides news, entertainment, sports, weather and other visual images. Not only adult, most children can easily turn on and off the television. This easy access to television could be harmful to many children.
There are many violence and aggressive acts on television. Children are exposed to those scenes and adjust to the violence. Usually they think it is okay to hurt someone because on TV, so-called good guys have a right to hit, kick, and punch bad guys. Children justify themselves as good guys and imitate them, in particular, children thinks smoking is not bad because teenagers on TV are smoking. Those children who like to watch violent acts form aggressive selfishness personality. In Korea, there are many variety shows. Often, these shows comprise members of singers, actors, and comedians. On show, they usually have some talks and games. Sometimes, those talks they utter is whether sexual, and inappropriate to children. They are saying without compunction. They exaggerate as cool, fun and exciting. Usually there is no point of conversation. Some people say a lot of TV programs discuss educational, social issues. And help to understand other culture. But TV can affect children's health condition. Long time watching TV causes them a lack of physical activities and obesity. It shows that TV prohibits kids to exercise and some other things as reading.
Watching TV is not a great idea to children. The violence and meaningless discussion would influence kids in bad way. It also harms children on health. Parents should avoid kids watching a television long time. And TV programmers should put rating on some shows. Therefore many children can evade those disadvantages from television.
To Cheong Kyung Seo From Kim Kyung Un
ReplyDelete1. What I like about your writing is that it is organized well, with clear thesis statementm goog reasons to back up your opinion with examples that explain them.
2. Your main point seems to be that watching T.V is harmful to many chilren.
3. In your essay, I liked the sentence, "TV programmers should put rating on some shows" becuase I thought that was one of the good solutions to preventing children being exposed to this unappropriate content on TV.
4. none.
5. The biggest improvement you can make in your writing, in my opinion, is your introductory paragraph. I think it would be better to include hook sentence with background and abit with more content in it.
Television is the most affective electronics to human life. It provides news, entertainment, sports, weather and other visual images. Not only adult, most children can easily turn on and off the television. According to the Kaiser Family Foundation, children, 8 to 18 years old, spend nearly 4 hours a day in front of a TV. This easy access to television could be harmful to many children.
ReplyDeleteThere are many violence and aggressive acts on television. Children are exposed to those scenes and adjust to the violence. Usually they think it is okay to hurt someone because on TV, so-called good guys have a right to hit, kick, and punch bad guys. Children justify themselves as good guys and imitate them, in particular, children thinks smoking is not bad because teenagers on TV are smoking. Those children who like to watch violent acts form aggressive selfishness personality. In Korea, there are many variety shows. Often, these shows comprise members of singers, actors, and comedians. On show, they usually have some talks and games. Sometimes, those talks they utter is whether sexual, and inappropriate to children. They are saying without compunction. They exaggerate as cool, fun and exciting. Usually there is no point of conversation. Some people say a lot of TV programs discuss educational, social issues. And help to understand other culture. But TV can affect children’s health condition. Long time watching TV causes them a lack of physical activities and obesity. It shows that TV prohibits kids to exercise and some other things as reading.
Watching TV is not a great idea to children. The violence and meaningless discussion would influence kids in bad way. It also harms children to be healthy. From Media Awareness Network, it suggests that Parents should avoid kids to watch a television long time. And TV programmers should put rating on some shows. Therefore many children can evade those disadvantages from television.